Good Gay Gone Bad Reloaded

I think that I may need to take a vow of celibacy because I've had sex yet again. Last night and this morning actually. I'm not proud of myself at all and I'm quite upset after thinking about it all. Have I become a whore in my old age? I'm down and I really need some things to change. Oh well ... fuck my life. Wait, that's my problem - I'm fucking my life away! Sorry I wasn't cheery, witty and clever in this post but life and all roses... *sigh*

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Good Gay Gone Bad

Well, it seems that I may have a touch of clairvoyance... Maybe it's my Louisiana roots or something? I've been hinting at certain sexual situations possibly happening, but never was I seriously considering them. At least not the threesome shit. I do not like to share in bed and I'm extremely territorial and jealous. So last night I hit up the spot with my faithful homies Rita and Jasper and I invited a friend to come who said that he'd bring his coworker. A few of my coworkers also stated an interest in my weekend plans, but the hoes didn't show up so whatever. Fuck em. I invited the ex and his boo, but unfortunately, there wasn't room and they left. I was disappointed in that being that it was the newbie's birthday but they made out just fine. So it was the five of us there and we got blitzed. Three fifths of the table are gay(ish). Well, it may have been a higher percentage, but I'm not allowed to say anything so I'll let you speculate as to whether Rita has been playing in the lady pond or if Jasper is down with the moustache clique. My friend's coworker is kinda cute and around my age so we began flirting before we were boozing, thank you very much. Judgmental hoes. At some point, he began feeding me from his plate and rubbing my right thigh and butt cheek. It was a bit exhilarating. Cute, new guy flirting with you... Who wouldn't like that? The new guy is a Spanish teacher and he starts speaking to me in en espanol about wanting a kiss. I translate for my friend and he says something that I flip into him wanting a 3 way kiss. I couldn't have created the foreshadowing of last night's fuckery in my previous entries if I'd tried, but I swear this shit isn't made up. I'm not that creative. Let's fast forward... I'm rushing things along because I didn't eat my food last night and I'm hungover today. This is such a rarity for me and I don't deal well with it at all. At the end of the night, or what I thought was going to be the end of the night, we end up at amigo's truck and the 3 way kissing begins. It progresses into the truck and we all end up on the back seat kissing, groping, biting, moaning and sucking. I'm going to leave some things to the imagination, but I will say that body parts appeared but no one got to the center of the tootsie pop or the creamy Twinkie filling. Does this count as a threesome? I don't know but either way, this good gay went rogue. I need to get a big ghetto chain with GGGB on it. Dope shit.

Divine Intervention?

My first call of the day at work today was with a very nice and talkative minister. He wanted to cancel but I talked him into getting a better plan than he had. We were talking for 30 minutes and I've never had a conversation that long with a customer. He began to tell me about his oldest son who is 35 and the product of a previous relationship. They only recently reconnected in the past couple of years and get along great. His son was previously married but recently came to terms being homosexual. Mr. Minister says he's completely fine with his son's sexuality and loves him dearly. I'm thinking wow...that's pretty progressive. He even acknowledges how strange it may seem that he would be so accepting of his son's sexuality. Apparently, the son is the only person who really had a hard time accepting it. So Mr. Minister goes on and on about how great his son is and he states, "I don't know why I'm telling you all this," and proceeds to gush even more about his amazing offspring. So Super Son has a $14k watch that the father admired. Son offers watch to father. Father declines... Son then buys father a new watch while in Manila. Yes, that's right. Manila, Philippines. Not only did he buy a watch for his father, but he bought one for his brother and bought Coach purses for his step mother. WTF?? The son really seems amazing from all I heard. He's written a book and has a great job...he's a body builder and the model for the book cover. I was provided with the title and website for the book. Son is kinda sexy... I felt like Mr. Minister was trying to hook me up with his son! I just hate that it was all recorded. I hope that this call wasn't monitored. I don't want anyone to know that the minister is whoring his gay son out to me. Nor do I want anyone to realize that I actually wrote that information down and intend to use it. I mean, God blessed me...shouldn't I just accept His blessings and give thanks? I think that's the Christian way. Hallelujah!

Lesson 6: Recovery

Yes, that says Lesson 6: Recovery. LOL. I would explain it, but I don't have time and I don't feel like it. Regardless....


For my broken hearted amigos: Get out and get over em! Easier said than done, right? Of course! It's hard, but it's hard for your friends to see you home upset over a situation that you cannot change. Date again! Not saying you should jump into a new relationship, but go out and have fun. You never know what may happen ;-) Ciao!

It's finally hit the fan!

Jasper text me yesterday saying that his wife had been in the ER with terrible migraines. He said that he was at home with her and she was high on meds. I really thought that things were improving between them until he called me today. Apparently she talks in her sleep and began to call him someone else's name. Another man's name. He told me the name and this man is her ex boyfriend, "Brian". Not only is he an ex boyfriend, but he's an ex fiance. I was in total shock. He grabbed her phone and decided to give Brian a call. He said he'd found the phone in the breezeway and wanted to know if Brian knows the owner. Brian confirmed that he does in fact know the owner and that she is his girlfriend. Jasper then asks if Brian knows which apartment she lives in and he gives it to him. So Jasper confronts Chanel when she wakes up. He tells her that she'd been calling him Brian in her sleep and asks if she knows him. She confirms says she does... Then he drops the bomb on her letting her know that he spoke to him and knows that he's her boyfriend. Chanel then tells him "I need you to leave." He went back to check on her since she's still not feeling well but she's gone missing again. Her family can't find her again. Jasper's now going to file for divorce and I'm really shocked at how this has happened. I honestly don't know the person that Chanel has become. I really hope that she gets her life together because this is all a huge mess. A big, sad mess. There's a lot that I'm leaving out of this because there are some things that shouldn't be uttered even in death. And here was thinking that I had the most fucked up relationship year... I guess I'm going to have to scrape all my coins up and hit Coin Star so that Rita and I can take Jasper out for drinks at our favorite watering hole. It's either that or shake my papaya and passion fruit down at The Nasty Kitty and since I've retired my thongs, Coin Star it is!

A Tale of Two Exes

Last night was one of my ex boyfriend's birthday dinner celebration and he invited me as stated from my previous entry. It really went well. Dayna was late of course but so was the guest of honor... However, Dayna's tardiness always exceeds everyone else's. C'est la vie I guess. *Kanye shrug* So the night went a bit different than I thought that it would. I actually sat next to him and we chatted a bit. Ok, so we flirted and fed each other cheesecake and hugged and kissed. I'm only telling the truth because some of you fuckers were there or have already seen the pictures, otherwise I'd deny it all. I may still deny it. Fuck the rules! His friends and my friends all think we're so cute together and whatnot... Of course we are, but I'm not sure if we're good together. Maybe I'll see what happens over the next few days. It was nice to see and caress him a bit though. I saw my friend that I was bitching about previously, too. He came to the second spot where we were having drinks. We'd already made up but it was good to see him. I somehow only managed to get pictures of his posterior though. No, really...it wasn't my intent this time. One of my friends who I haven't seen in a while showed up and she also follows the blog. Since she found out that I gave a couple of people aliases to protect their identities she wants one too. She wants to be called "Amber" but since it's my show and I make the rules... request denied! Jenna it is! Ok so Jenna brought her friend "Lexi" with her whom I've never met, but heard much about. I had no idea that Lexi was so...intense. She's extremely opinionated and she seems to form  her opinions very quickly. She was going to hook me up with a friend of hers but he didn't come for some reason. After seeing the interaction between the birthday boy and me, she came to the conclusion that things wouldn't work out with her friend and me because her friend isn't feminine. So because she sees me dating one guy who may be a bit softer, she's already ruled out the possibility that I'd date a more masculine guy. WTF?? I'm not sure about how I'm going to like Lexi but Jenna is my heart! Maybe I need to have a sober outing with the two of them to get a better feel for Lexi. She's a ride or die chick and she's been a good friend to Jenna. I'm sure there's something I'd like about her, but we both have strong personalities. I see my Taurean horns coming out. 


On to the next one... Today I met my other ex boyfriend's current boyfriend. Remember, the one that I was waving to awkwardly on Friday? Yeah, I met him today. He seems nice. He's tall, attractive, nice smile... Hope things work out for them. They seem to mesh well so far. I haven't totally ruled out that 3 way thing after meeting him. No, I'm kidding. I think I want to date a Latin guy next. Brazilian, perhaps... I also met ex boyfriend's best friend who is also handsome with really nice eyes. We went to TGIFriday's and I left my wallet at home. Total accident. I would never go to a restaurant without intentions of eating or drinking! Even thought I had cheesecake last night, I had my heart set on getting the vanilla cheesecake today too. Oh well, maybe that was God intervening. I've been drinking and eating a lot lately. I think it's so that I can forget reality. Ex boyfriend and his bestie pretended to argue the whole time. It was cute. It reminded me of one of my friendships. They discussed how the ex always thinks that he's right and then tried to get me to pick a side. I'm Switzerland in this thing. That man still has a key to my place and I do not need to come home to a torched apartment or have dog poo smeared all over everything. My lips are sealed. All in all, it was a pretty good weekend and I hope to hang with at least some of these people again soon. Not a lot happened this weekend, but it was a lot. 

Tres Amigos... Again

This post is most likely going to be a bit random and scattered. Yesterday was a bit of a wacky day for me at work and at play. There was stuff I fucked up at work and had to fix... Our email went down so there was some shit that couldn't be done... It was a mess. I was kinda up and down all day so I was pretty stoked about going home. Just as I was walking up to my door, I see a guy with his 2 dogs and thought he might be my ex's new booski. I looked and waved awkwardly...not because he's the new guy, but because I'm usually awkward around people I don't know. Plus, I wasn't sure if it was him from that distance. He lives just a hop, skip and a jump away. Can we say 3 way? Hello!!!!!! Just kidding. I'm not that kind of guy. Yet. I text the ex and told him that I thought I saw his guy. He text back laughing saying that dude said the same when he got back in the apartment. I can't wait to meet him. He seems cool.

Anyway, I went out with Jasper and Rita again and we got shit faced. Again. I think that we all need dates or something because I see 3 possibilities if we continue to hang out this way: 1. we're going to end up getting beer bellies; 2. we're going to become bitter and jaded; 3. we're going to have a 3 way. I said I'm not that guy yet motherfuckers but I'm becoming open minded. Or desperately in need of affection. Call Judge Judy and let her decide. We got good and liquored up and headed home as all responsible adults do... On the way out I see my hot lesbian friends from a few weeks ago and their boy. They were looking good as always and he was....meh.... I hugged the Latina and chatted for a bit about how I never knew how stacked the other girl is. Since Jasper had already left us, Rita and I decided that we should head home as well. Plus, she had to work this morning. 


Too much has happened over the past few days. Last night while on the way to dinner (and during) I argued with my friend that took me to that hole in the wall club about how when I ask him to go out he's tired or never available. Everyone knows that I have sleep issues. When I go out at night and stay out, I'm tired as well. I just push through it for my friends even if I don't wanna be there. It doesn't seem that he wants to do the same. He also wants me to change my plans for tonight and hang with him and his other friend. Selfish much? I'm supposed to tell my ex (different from above mentioned ex and not the most recent ex) that I'm not going to his birthday dinner that I RSVP'd a month ago because my selfish friend wants to hang out this weekend? Methinks not! Oh and Mr. DL is gone. He got mad because he wanted to hang out Wednesday night and I told him it wasn't a good night. He kept pressing the issue and I told him if he wanted to come over he'd have to be ok with meeting my ex (the 1st ex I mentioned) because he was coming over. He said that I have ex drama and he doesn't want to be a part of it. My ex and I have no drama at all. We talk, we hang out, I grab his ass occasionally... but I do that with all my friends! Well, not the straight men, but ya know... So he said he needs to protect himself. I'm like ok I'm not mad. Confused, but not mad. You don't want a relationship. Why would my hanging out with my ex be such a big deal? You're not my boyfriend and you don't want to be! My ex and I do not have sex with each other, nor would we cross that line. At least we wouldn't while in relationships with other people. This whole shit is a mess. Never again will I talk to another confused motherfucker. This is why I left the church men alone! SMDH. 

The Latest, Greatest and Lamest. SMH

So lemme tell you about these DL men. I was chatting with a guy on the gay web and he said he's DL. You know the type...too DL to have pictures or tell you his real name or even be around the gays - yet they wanna fuck. *side eye* I honestly didn't think anything was going to happen other than conversation so when he asked for my number, I obliged. Dude starts texting me and the conversation is ok. He's in grad school, from out of town blah, blah, blah... Then he starts sending me pictures. Or pretending to anyway. I get about 4 or 5 "pictures" from him that I can't download, yet I'm receiving pictures AND video from everyone else without a problem. And the pictures that he was sending me were supposedly of his dick. Really? Is that supposed to impress me? Eventually he calls me and starts to speak of this "arrangement" that he wants me to participate in. So he wants us to be regular sex partners without a relationship or whatever and he's also going to be sleeping with women on the side too. I was like hold up... Oh so he corrected me by saying there would only be one woman he's sleeping with and I'd be the only man he's sleeping with. Dude, say what now? I tell him that this type of arrangement wouldn't work for me but I do appreciate his honesty. Most of these guys don't even tell you so that you can make an informed decision about whether to take that chance or not. I commend him for that. It just doesn't work for me. However, I do wonder if this poor woman was informed. I know what he's telling me, but was she given the rundown as well? Most likely, no. And if she's a black woman, hell no. Why put myself in a situation where I can possibly catch feelings and become jealous? I already know that it would end badly. I've already told him several times that it just wouldn't work. He keeps stressing how good his sex is as if that's my focus. It isn't hard form me to get sex if that's what I want! He wanted to come meet me but I'll pass on that shitty deal. I'd rather be alone that to be a part of that unholy threesome. He can burn with someone else. "All the bullshit is for the birds... You aint nothing but a vulture. Deuces."

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-iJqlhg6TdU

Where Do Broken Hearts Go?

I said I wasn't going to blog about my relationship in one of my previous posts. Well, since it seems to be over I'll say a little something about it... It was simply the best month that I've had this year. I've really had a fucked up year for those who don't know... Just as the employment gods have it in for me, so do Eros and Aphrodite. Those of you who do not know who they are should go ahead and Google them for now. After you finish the blog go and read some more about them. Don't worry, I'll wait. Again. *side eye* Anyway, it seemed that everything was going well and then suddenly he's become unresponsive. I don't know if I've done something or didn't do something. I keep reaching out and I get nothing. Meh.... Well, last night I hung with two of my friends are also having relationship issues. Not sure if I should use their real names so I'll call them Rita and Jasper.

Rita was in a really good relationship with a really nice and attractive guy. He's so different from the previous dickhead that she dated and all of us like him. He's indicated to her that he no longer wants a relationship. Not that she's done anything wrong or sex was bad or there was a lack of sex or anything... He just doesn't want a relationship right now. Methinks he's scared. I mean who leaves a perfectly good relationship?? She's met his family who adores her and even told them he was gonna marry her. WTF?

Jasper is bleeding heart number 3. He's been married for just a little less than a year. I'm not sure what the fuck is wrong with his wife. She and I used to be really good friends. In fact, we were friends first. She decided to tell him that she no longer wants to be married and and the nerve to be upset that he got her cell phone cut off. I mean, I think that was a pretty mild reaction. Other people have gotten their asses beat or even killed...bank accounts drained...credit ruined... I think she got off light. She thought that was the worst thing in the world that he could have ever done to her and she was so upset and hurt by it. Really chick? You told him you want a divorce and you're the one who's hurt?? GTFOH. She's decided to cut herself off from everyone in the entire solar system. She's a repeat offender of this behavior. Jasper has scheduled counseling for them, but has very little faith that it will do much good. I've been praying for them as well. I really hope that she comes around. If she leaves him, I'm taking him. He's educated, has a job, helped her pay for school... I'm sure there's some bad in there too but we all have negative qualities. She's not even trying.

So there you have it, we 3 amigos went out to our favorite watering hole last night and slammed our other halves while getting wasted. Ok, not really...more like we whined and felt bad for ourselves and each other. LOL. I'm surprised that I was able to drive home because I could barely walk. I ended up texting him and got no reply until today. Honestly, his reply isn't even worth mentioning. I'm hurt by how it's ended, but the experience before all of this was phenomenal. I've been getting encouragement from the most unlikely person: one of my exes. He's been really great throughout it all. I'm not giving up on love at all. I'm just unsure of where to find it now. 


Oh and here's a link for how to heal a broken heart.


http://superlative1.wordpress.com/2010/06/08/never-let-anyone-steal-your-sunshine/


http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nVou0kjCjDw


http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8yvsU4SNWPA