Last night...12.31.11 version

Long time no update, I know. I'm a bad blogger. A lot has changed lately. Some of you may know, some may not. I now find myself in a relationship with a great guy. Well, I don't know when/how it became official but I'm no longer on any of the dating sites/apps. If he had his way, we would have made it official on the first date LOL.  Anyway, we've been seeing each other since the last week of November and spending a lot of time together. Last night he said he wanted me to spend the night. He cooked dinner while I watched Harry Potter something or other....whatever the last movie is. Clearly I haven't seen all of them yet. I had dinner, wine and then a splash in his Jacuzzi coupled with more wine... And then there was sex. Good sex. And he has a curved peen! Yes, if you know me, you know I avoid those like people avoid bill collectors. I honestly haven't been in relationship like this in a long time. He likes to spoil me...and he's my age. All of this came as a huge surprise to me. Hopefully it will continue to go well. Wish me well!

Scattered post

This post is gonna kinda be all over the place. Sorry guys. I'm not in the editing mood so I basically typed as things came to my head. I just made sure that spelling was correct and I slightly tried with grammar. Last night I hung out with someone that I had a prior connection with. When I knew him before he was young and immature...oh and a little bit sexy. Okay, maybe a lot sexy. I text him Sunday night just to ask how he was and he said we should hang out. We haven't seen each other face to face in years. I was a bit nervous about meeting him again because I wasn't sure what his intentions are. I'm still not totally sure. We've had sex in the past so I have mixed emotions about it all. Sometimes I wanna jump him, sometimes I want more. Well, I usually want more anyway... He came over and we watched tv. It actually watched us while we talked and caught up. The last time that he and I really spoke I was in a rocky relationship and he was engaged. To a woman. Yes, I know... *face palm* Now I'm single and so is he. He said she's a great woman but she just wasn't what he was looking for. Clearly he's bisexual but he leans more towards XY than XX. I just told him the situation with my ex just didn't work out. I'm not gonna bash him but I believe I'm Chris Crossed at this time (Charmed reference!). He gave me such a great hug when he came in the door... We really had a great time just talking and watching The Hangover. Of course any conversation with me turns sexual at some point even when I'm the one being good! I mentioned something about asking him to sing after he noticed my tattoo... He said I may hear him sing in the shower some day. Really sir? It's funny how people remember events. He remembers our first time meeting as being at a club and then going to his aunt's house where we had sex. I had to remind him that we met online first and then at my apartment. He was looking all shy and innocent.. That was all a ruse. He isn't shy or innocent at all. That was the first time we met and we didn't have sex! SMH. We probably hung out like 5 or more times before we had sex so I'm not sure why he thinks it was that soon. A mind really is a terrible thing to have. He asked if I gave him a hug when he came in knowing good and damned well that I did. I gave him another one because it benefited us both and I wanted to sniff him some more. He smelled like soap and Roberto Cavalli cologne. He said something like I'll see you later right before he left. I'm always skeptical when people say they wanna stick around, as you know. I don't have faith in people any more but I must say it was so nice to hang with him. He said I make him nervous. He's all shy and stuff around me, which really isn't his personality. I asked when did you get all shy and he said I don't know. When did you get all not shy? I guess we both have changed a lot since we last spent time together. We talked, we laughed, we flirted, we held hands, we hugged, we kissed... Well, he gave me a peck on the lips after I hugged him good night. That was it. No hands roaming. Well... Okay, I squeezed his butt a few times. Hey, I'm an ass man! He text me and let me know he'd made it home and I replied with damn you got sexier! He said he was thinking the same thing about me. :-)

Last night...

Long time no blog, I know. Sue me. Y'all don't pay me so I blog on my time. Yes, rude I know...but it's a gift and a curse.

Some of you know that I had an incident with my mailbox keys at my apartment complex. Brief synopsis: The bitches changed my mailbox locks and keys by mistake. It took me two weeks to get that resolved. Well there's a guy named Erand that works in the leasing office after hours who helped me get my keys. I was stopping by that office every day after work for 2 weeks! The night that I got the keys, he pretended that they still didn't have the keys. I said you have to be kidding me! I'm going to have to do this again on Monday?? I was freaking out and annoyed. He started laughing and said I'm just playing, I have your keys. I wanted to smack the shit out of him and hug him at the same time. I guess you could say that we'd had some flirty moments, but initially I wasn't sure if he is part of the Reading Rainbow or not. I found him attractive either way. He's about 6'2", dark skinned, basketball player build... I think the first time I met him I said to myself he was cute but he had on this aftershave that made me want to vomit. So anyway, after getting my keys we talked for about 20 minutes and he took my number and said he'd text me. We've been texting back and forth for about 2 weeks or maybe a little more but it's usually just small talk. He says stuff like "Sup bruh" so I wasn't sure how to read him. Last night, I was out with my bestie "Rita" and he began texting me that he was trying to find some liquor or a way to get some. I figured he was having car problems and offered to take him since he'd been helpful to me. He ended up telling me that his mom bought him a 6 pack of Smirnoff and some Patron. So the drunk texts begin. "What you doin bruh?"... "I'm hot"... I say turn on the fan or a/c. He then explains that he was horny and says, "Well talk to your friend. I'm gone find somebody to suck on this dick." Being the generous person that I am, I offer my assistance. Taking a cue from another friend, I decided to try something different. *shrugs* Erand's dick is huge. No lie. It wasn't hard and it looked like it was all folded up or something. Well, I did the dirty deed...he did me too...I'm not going to get too graphic, but I was pleased. Twice. I honestly thought he was gonna be an asshole and I wouldn't see him again or want to. Now I'm not so sure. Pros: He's in my apt complex, single, good looking, says he wants a relationship, got his own place and car... Cons: He's 22, has a bad attitude (that he's working on), possibly DL. He's texting me now. I'll keep you abreast of any major developments. It makes me think of the song below (download link included):

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Pmz2KVMuABo

http://hulkshare.com/q58wkb2y651z

Latest Obsession...

So I'm now hooked on Supernatural although I'm like a million years late on this show. It scares the shit out of me. I'm thinking of trying to get all of the seasons on DVD now. I'm watching it now and ready to piss myself. OMG this show is freaking me out right now!!!!!! Please feel free to purchase a season or two for me. I won't be offended. I'm also depressed for some reason. I'm not sure why. I think it may be related to work and bills. I mean, I pretty much always have something to do on the weekends so I'm not bored. Thoughts? Random: I'm mad about having a postcard on my windshield for a Gucci Mane appearance at Level II when I got off of work. So overit.com.

Holy oil or gun oil... Or just fuck it?

Been a minute guys. So sorry for the neglect.... I've been wanting to blog but I've been unsure what to talk about and also I haven't sat down and made the time to. I've had a few crazy calls at work lately and thought I'd share some of the better ones. We'll start with nut #1: The Church Mother. One lady wanted to cancel her home warranty with us because she said that we're scamming her and the tech was scamming her as well. I tried to get more information but she wasn't having. I talked to the previous rep she spoke with in my department to get a little more information and made him aware that she wasn't going to keep it. He said he was ready to let her go anyway because she's crazy. Of course I wanted to know what the fuck went down. Turns out that she's one of these religious fanatics that I loathe. This woman put holy oil on her a/c compressor and then tried to anoint the tech as well when he came to make the diagnosis. I just don't understand how you can just try to put holy oil on a person... Would that not count as assault?? It certainly would lead to assault if she'd tried to put that oil on me. I don't take kindly to people trying to force their religious beliefs on others. Enough of my soap box...

Let's move on to nut #2: Gun Smoke. Totally different lady calls and says that she doesn't feel safe because our tech lied to her and replaced her garage door opener with a used one. Surprisingly, the notes corroborated what she was saying. He admitted to using a unit that he had. He also charged her some additional money that he didn't report to our company. I knew that I wasn't gonna be able to keep her from canceling, but I tried anyway. She went on to say that the tech lied to her again and that he was also lying to our company. She said he pretended not to remember her address but was then reciting it from memory. She has a fear that he will try to come back to her house and break in. I'm not sure why because I'm pretty sure he doesn't want that old ass pussy. She said she's in her 70s. Maybe she has a really nice house? I don't know, but the bitch said if he comes back to her house she's going to shoot him. Did I mention that she's from Texas? LOL. So at this point I had to tell a supervisor that she threatened the tech with bodily harm and we would cancel her contract and make her non renewable. I also emailed contractor relations to inform them of the incident. This chick emails me back saying the tech wasn't aware of the lady being unhappy and that the tech was going to call her to talk. WTF?? Why the hell would you further incite this woman to anger? Clearly she isn't all there. I'm beginning to think that the tech and contractor relations need some medical assistance as well.

Nut job #3: The Navy Seal. Dude calls all upset about his a/c being denied for lack of maintenance. He thinks that we're supposed to clean it and shit. Clearly he didn't read the fucking warranty. Maintenance isn't covered, you dick! That's what I wanted to say. Instead I listened and listened and listened. He could really talk. I again tried to explain the coverage to him since the first person he spoke with didn't get through to him. Apparently, he has more water in his head than he has brains. He of course wants to cancel and he wants all of his money. At this point he's only entitled to a prorated refund of around $74. He's uber pissed and just says, "Fuck it! Just give me the $74. Fuck it! And put that in quotes in the notes. Fuck it!" Of course I laughed because I'm an evil fucker and I found this to be hilarious. I also love the word "fuck" and take delight in it's usage. I begin to go over the cancellation policy and a light bulb comes on. He says he needs to talk with his wife before he makes a final decision. I note the account that he's keeping it for now and provided him with my direct number for call back. I tell you, if my life were a reality show it definitely wouldn't be one of those scripted things. I wouldn't need a script because it's just so fucking crazy without one. Where's that holy oil? Aww, never mind. Fuck it!

I Dream of...Work?

Been a minute since the last update but my boo spent all of last week here with me. I'm surprised that we didn't kill each other but we honestly had a pretty good week. There wasn't really any drama that I can recall. The combination of my insomnia and some sort of childhood trauma are both probably affecting my memory I'm sure. Onto the good stuff... Last night I had a dream that I was at work taking calls as always and the customer wanted to cancel...as always. Now somehow my company had become entwined with the porn business as well in my dream. The customer was talking about cancelling because we didn't repair something but also because he was tired of us calling his wife in attempts to whore her out. I apologized and tried to show him the value of the warranty and offered him a service fee card and a free porn dvd to smooth things over. He was fine with that and actually said he'd keep the warranty. I was kinda shocked because I really didn't try too hard. So a week later Mr. Homeowner calls back upset and wanting to cancel again. I'm really confused as to what's happened now because there weren't any new notes in the system and new work orders. He tells me that he will never use our company again and we have humiliated him and destroyed his life. I'm sitting here thinking, "What the fuck is this nut talking about? I'm ready to cancel this bitch" but I try sweet talking him again and asking him to give us another chance. He tells me that he got the free dvd and saw his wife getting dicked down and nutted on and in by a gang of 30 men of all different nationalities. "So Mr. Smith you'll receive a cancellation letter in 14-21 business days and I've removed your payment information from our system. Thank you for allowing me the opportunity to assist you and thank you for our newest porn star."

Scarlet Letter anyone?

I'm over here on my death bed and can barely move and no one is checking on me. Fuck you all to hell! I'm just kidding. I have the flu and my friends that know have checked on me and asked if I need anything. I'm so grateful for them all. One even brought me meds, soup and juice offered to take me to the doctor. That kinda brings me to my latest thought or whatever... I have one friend who people keep calling a hoe and at first it really bothered me. I mean a lot of people have said it...even guys I've dated but I haven't mentioned it to him or anything. I'm not even sure that I should. Whenever someone brings it up, I just say well he's a good friend to me so that's really all that matters. One person I dated even asked if we've had sex! Now I have no way of knowing whether my friend is spreading is pb&j all over the milky way or not and I don't really care as long as he's not reaching in my bread box. Very rarely have I even heard him talk about having sex with anyone so it's just hard for me to believe that he is. The most important thing I've learned from all of this is that everyone has a past. Unfortunately, we all are judged on our pasts and usually unfairly. How would you feel if every single mistake you've made followed you around all of your life? How'd you feel to be Hester Prynne (The Scarlett Letter)? If you haven't read The Scarlett Letter I blame your high school educational system. But basically, the woman has an adulterous affair and has the man's baby. She was not only put in prison, but when they let her out, she had to wear a scarlet letter "A" to make everyone aware of her crime. That's some deep shit!  I try to always give people the benefit of the doubt and not totally judge them based on something that someone else has said. Who's to say that I'll have the same type of experience with that person or that he/she hasn't changed? I'm just glad that "people" don't decide my ultimate destination when my life is over. Otherwise, none of us would make it into heaven.... Every saint has a past and every sinner has a future is what I've been told. I agree. I feel that people can change but once you get a reputation, it's extremely difficult to shake. My philosophy is that there's always a hating ass hoe waiting to trip you with her stiletto...

Nightmare turned provocative question

Last night I had a dream that I was fucking my bijou at mom's and she walked in on us. She didn't say much about it but this was a dream. Besides, when she later asked who's going to Florida he decided to be first to say yes and she said not as my son's boyfriend. Again, this was a dream and I'm sure my late night dinner, martini and time on the fun wheel aka doing the bed bop all had some influence. Mom wouldn't be pleased at all. This whole dream sequence led me to my questions... How would you react if you caught your child having sex (teen to adult) and would your reaction be different if it were someone of the same sex?

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Bullshit, besties and boyfriend

Recently, I've been having issues with work. I really hate that job more often than not. I'm revising my resume currently so that I can get the fuck up outta there. I need more money and less stress, but don't we all? There's this one stupid bitch fucking with me about what I'm doing and when I'm doing it. This bastard isn't my supervisor, he's not my manger, he's not even a team lead or help desk supervisor yet always has a inquiry about my comings and goings. Again, he's not my superior, my keeper, my father, house mother, nor baby sitter... He is, however, a fat, old, bitter,snake in the grass messy gay bitch. I was pissed Friday, all weekend and this morning. By lunch, I was over it. Every time he looked at me, I looked right through him as if I were just saying a big fuck you. I'm just glad I didn't go off on him for harassing me. I need my job even though I hate it...

I'm concerned about Kendal. I haven't heard anything from him in a few weeks now and I'm not really sure what to think. I really wish that he'd call, email, text or something. Lord knows I don't wanna put another friend in the category with that chick I used to be cool with. If you don't know who I'm talking about, go back and read... I can't remember what alias I used to protect the guilty back then and I'm too lazy to look it up. I remember Rita and Jasper so I figure that's enough. I haven't spoken to Jasper in a while either. Lord knows that I can't afford to lose any friends. Half of em don't answer the phone and the other half doesn't reply to texts. SMH. I take that back... Rita responds to everything! If I start buying gifts for friends, that bitch getting everyone else's gifts. Hey, she's consistent and considerate! I'm so happy for her in her new relationship too. She's so deserving after all she's been through. Now I gotta find someone for Jasper...

Back to the past weekend's shenanigans... My cousin came up from Louisiana. The whole thing was foolish to me because he didn't give me proper notice. Anyone who knows me knows how I feel about that type of shit. We ended up having a pretty decent time albeit short. He wasted my Friday night and Saturday morning. Y'all know I could've been cuddling with my booski during all that time. We made up for it though. I definitely am not celibate this go round and I'm pretty happy about that. That's all that I will really say about my sex life. The relationship is pretty good. Just wish that he didn't live so far away. With gas prices the way they are I'm gonna need 3 jobs to afford this relationship or move him in. Neither of us is ready for that type of move right now. Hell, we have a hard time deciding on where to eat. He's making me be more decisive though, which I find to be both scary and exciting...

#2 Pencils?

So Janie and I were on the phone a few minutes ago and we had a conversation about #2 pencils because she's taking some type of test today. I don't remember if she said what test or why but anyway, she had to have pencils and she wasn't sure if she needed #2 or not. Turns out she doesn't, but it sparked one of our conversations as to why #2 pencils are always required and why we never see any other type. Of course I'm a pretty logical person so I just assumed that maybe people in specialized trades probably use the other #s. I did a quick Google search and found the nugget of awesomeness below about #2 pencils. Yes, I'm weird.

http://www.straightdope.com/columns/read/2107/how-come-you-see-2-pencils-but-no-1-pencils

Pimpin in hard times

Since the gas prices are a million dollars now I've devised a plan to whore out one of my best friends. Hey, I need money so it's whatever. I've told her about it and plan to give her a cut of the money. At first I was going to do it myself but I figure that we can make more money if I use her. I have a list of good reasons as to why she'd be a better hooker than I would.

1. She's female.

2. She's soft.

3. More holes. Sometimes guys want options. I only have two. She has three. We can charge more.

4. She's light skinned and I figure that we can use her more markets. We can make her look racially ambiguous. I can probably only pass for a couple of things: black and African-American.

5. She has more experience and she's a freak.

6. See our picture below. See? If you were a loser who couldn't get no pussy you'd probably pay for that. Just kidding. This is all in fun! (Unless she's gonna do it). Happy Saturday everyone.

Edit: Kendal will be the next friend I whore out even though he's male... 

Desperado

I swear I feel like I've written this exact blog before. I didn't find it in the search so if I'm repeating myself please forgive me. My insomnia doesn't help my memory. I still don't feel like I should be in reruns already.
The job is stressing me the fuck out. I think I'm losing my hair. I bet someone laughed about that considering that I'm bald. But no seriously, the job is just really getting to me. I'm losing my appetite and I hate life right now. Now maybe I shouldn't feel that way because I have a job, but I do. I feel like vomiting or crying or both every day now. I gotta find something else. I'm working on this resume. I need something new asap.

So...there's this butch lesbian chick at my job that I used to be cool with. She was talking slick to me though, so you know she didn't last long. She couldn't deal with response to her dumb ass comments. I don't even remember what the bitch said, but she got her feelings hurt because she was intentionally antagonizing me. Needless to say, we're no longer cool at this point. One day while sitting in the break room I hear this clicking of heels and I just know a bad bitch is about to walk around the corner with some red bottoms on. Lo and behold it's this bitch. The girl at the table with me turns around and says, "Who is this with these desperado ass boots on?" I couldn't help but laugh about it. Now every time I see her in these boots I think "Desperado" and laugh to myself. Then I go back to my desk and dougie. Oh I don't care if you're judging me. I'm sure you've done something terrible like run over your neighbor's cat and didn't tell them or fuck your best friend's mom. Fuck you for judging me! Just kidding. Unless you really are judging me. Whores.

Edit: I'm sick of this motherfucker on Facebook sending me Cityville or Farmville requests all day. Bitch kill yoself

Insomnia part 6 million

Time: 1:06 am. This post is probably going to be very scattered and shit so forgive me or fuck yourself with a pine cone. Sorry, I never claimed that loving me is easy and having a pine cone up your pleasure canal definitely would be a challenge. I can't sleep and it's frustrating as hell. I even took a vicodin to help relax my mind. Nothing seems to work. Been praying. I don't know. Maybe weed is the next step? LOL. I don't think I could do that. I don't know where to find it nor do I know how to do all the other stuff you have to do to make it "smokeable" if that's a word. Anyway, yesterday was a pretty good work day. I retained 8 customers and my personal goal is 5 a day. That kinda makes up for only having 1 on Monday. I'm just praying that I can keep up the momentum through the rest of the week. It gets rough when we have such a high call volume. I get stressed, frustrated and start to feel like I can't do it. The boo tells me not to stress and that it's just a job. He's right but I don't know how to just relax and let things go. They linger in my mind and drive me crazy. I think it's because I'm a bit of a perfectionist. I truly have a desire to be the best at my job that I can be. Crazy idea, huh? Let me revisit the weed idea after I get a new high paying job. Maybe I'll just win the lotto. If someone else out there wins, please gift me some money. I'm not even asking for a milli. I just wanna pay off my current outstanding debt and I promise I'll be happy. If you're writing letters to Oprah, drop my government to her. Thanks in advance, kind souls.


How about these fucking gas prices?? I'm really not feeling this shit at all. Can someone just go knock Muammar el-Qaddafi the hell out and stop this shit? I'm tired of getting raped at the gas pump. Between that and our job market, America is fucked right now. Oh and what's with the spelling of dude's name?? Why is it all over the net 3 million different ways? I just picked one and ran with it. If you don't like the spelling I chose, eat a brick. My parents were contemplating coming this weekend, but won't due to the gas prices. I actually kinda wanted to see them this time. I miss my mommy... :-( I kinda wanna have a talk with her about something that will probably lead to an argument. *big fucking sigh* Maybe I should just send her a copy of "Born This Way" by Lady Gaga and say, "Let's discuss" after she listens. She probably wouldn't get it though and think it's weird...


How does everyone feel about this whole Nene-Kim-Sweetie controversy? I meant to blog about it a while ago when it happened but since I'm up and thinking about it now, now's the best time. Ok if you don't know what I'm talking about, Google is your friend. Hell, go to Bravo's website and I'm sure you can find it. Anyway, someone posted a picture of Sweetie on Facebook with a caption that said, "Free Sweetie" which I found to be ridiculous. My thinking is that she's not a slave, although Nene seems to think that Kim treats her like one. My feeling is that she's a grown woman and if she likes the way Kim talks to her, why the hell should we care? My friend from Facebook compared Sweetie to an indentured servant. I disagree. I also wonder if the reason there's an issue with it is because Kim's white and Sweetie's black. I didn't see anyone calling any of Diddy's various failed groups or assistants (Fonzworth Bentley and contestants) slaves after the way he's treated them on Making the Band or on I Want to Work for Diddy. After making a bitch cross that bridge for some cheesecake... The need or want for money sometimes makes us do things or put up with things that we wouldn't normally.  Again, grown people who chose their own paths is my thinking. *Kanye shrug* I want your thoughts. No, seriously, fucking reply you douches. Maybe the best way to get a response is to not call people douches, huh? My bad... Is bitch better? 


I've been listening to Marsha Ambrosious' CD and I think it's pretty awesome. I was just talking to a friend about it yesterday (sorry I forgot to call back). It's a pretty good listen from start to finish. Normally, I wouldn't be able to take Marsha's voice for too long because there's just something about her style of singing that irritates me at times. I actually can listen to the whole CD from start to finish without skipping any tracks. It's a nice baby making cd. I wanna practice to it this weekend if I can find a way to get to my boo. I was invited out to dinner and the club by a friend but I can't afford to do shit. With these gas prices I'm probably gonna have to give up some booty, dick and neck just to get half a tank of gas. 


I kinda wish that I could blog for a living. It's mostly stress-free and kinda fun when I have shit to talk about. I can be pretty open and just share my thoughts on various bullshit that doesn't have much relevance to people who don't know me. I rarely do this "in real life." I guess I kinda feel like I'm being judged and maybe that's something that I shouldn't care about. I usually just write whatever I feel and let it go but "in real life," I kinda over think everything. Oh well, maybe I'm actually getting sleepy now. I certainly hope I get some sleep because I'm going to be hell to tangle with if the wrong person gets caught up in my horns tomorrow. Will I care? Probably not. When people ask me why I'm so ornery I'll just say, "I'm a Taurus and I'm cute, what's your excuse?". I have a knack for making people dislike me and sometimes I actually enjoy it. What can I say? It's a gift and a curse. 


Oh and I added that picture of Aang at the top because that's how I feel when I can't sleep. Like a bitch been whoopin my ass. Plus, he's cute. 
  

Burning and leaking

So I think that I forgot to add this lil update due to all the Valentine's Day stuff and other commotion in my life... Well, this is part of the commotion. So the weekend before Valentine's Day, I was intimate with the booski and stuff was all good and whatnot... I began to feel a lil tingling in my dingaling around Monday. I really didn't think much of it but then it began to burn. I know what you're thinking! It never once crossed my mind. Ok, maybe it crossed my mind a few times, but seriously, I thought it was the UTI coming back or the lube we used. We used condoms so I really didn't think there was a chance that I'd caught something (although they aren't 100%). I end up back at the doctor, but thank God I was the only person there when I arrived so I got to the back rather quickly. Turns out I had an allergic reaction to the lube. So to all the bitches that was hoping my forest had a fire, so sorry. Lindsey Lohan is the only fire crotch at my house. Actually, I don't own any of her movies so... No need to call the fire department. And no, I'm not saying that she has an std. Fire crotch = red head. Enjoy the weekend!

Confused like hell

I'm not sure what's going on lately, but one of my friends and I seem to be a bit at odds. He's under the impression that I've abandoned him now that I'm in a relationship, but I've been feeling neglected by him as well. I call and text...sometimes multiple times in a day...I get no reply. Or I get a response days later. Or when we do talk, the his phone disconnects and then he's "unreachable" for a period of time. We're really good friends and he's basically the only gay friend that I have at this point. I don't really hang out with anyone else. I'm not sure how to fix it or if it can be fixed. I can only tell my side of things. Neglectful friend, I am not. Even if I don't answer the phone I always reply to texts. And keep in mind that I'm not big on phone conversation but I call him all the time. I'm beyond frustrated and a bit puzzled... edit. he's the only gay friend I hang with. all others ate outta town

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Time to Double Up

Well as of 2/7/11 I'm one half of a new dynamic duo. A brave, new, daring, dynamic gay force sent to save the land from injustice, poor hygiene and bad dressers. I'm just kidding but I'm no longer single. Officially. I wasn't sure if I wanted it to be on the 7th or the 8th. Still conflicted. I may have a talk with him about it tomorrow...or today or whatever the fuck day it is. I suppose it doesn't matter but I'm weird about even and odd numbers. I really like even numbers except the number 6...and I don't like odd numbers except the number 7. The number 8 is my favorite of them all... Oh well, fuck it! As you can see I'm over thinking yet again. Oh and I'm sick of this snow shit in our area. Just sick of it.

Edit: I'm cool with the date now since the numbers add up to be even. I know, it's weird and OCD-esque but it's part of me. Deal with it bitches.

Need a job? x Your church? No thank you.

This post originally started out about Future Chris, but I'm not sure how much I'll blog about him going forward. If we make things official I'll update on that and other eventful happenings, but I'm going to make an effort to keep him out of the updates if we become a couple. I'm not sure if that will be possible, though. Anyway, I had to go to the minor medical center's urgent care facility around the corner from my apartment earlier this week. I'll spare you the details, but let's say that I was burning and leaking. Just kidding! I haven't even been having sex so umm...no. However, I was having to urinate frequently and it did burn. I thought I was gonna piss myself before the doctor saw me. Turns out I have a urinary tract infection so I was prescribed some meds. There are 2 ladies who work at the front desk. One lady is Caucasian and the other is African-American. One lady didn't appear to be doing much behind the counter other than talking to one of her friends or a family member on the phone. I take that back, she was working, but she wasn't assisting any patients. She didn't really say much at all to anyone waiting. The other lady was very sweet and attentive. She was constantly smiling and going out of her way to be extremely helpful. An older couple commented on how much it appears she loves her job. I concurred. My doctor asked me to call the clinic yesterday to insure that she had me on the right antibiotics. I called and got Ms. Unpleasant Attitude. She said her name is Diane. Yes, I take names. She was perplexed as to why I would call and seemed to be inconvenienced by it. She finally decided to put me on hold to check to see if my culture had come back. When she returned to the line, she nastily explained that it wasn't back and that a nurse should call me and she doesn't know why I called. In my mind I said, "I called because the doctor told me to you stupid bitch. Didn't I already explain that to your dumb ass?" My oral response was that I only called because the doctor indicated that I should both face to face and on my discharge papers. She was still annoyed and said the culture wasn't in yet. I hung up. I called back several hours later and got this bitch again. I was so hoping it would be the pleasant helpful lady, but no. I was to endure more of Diane's tongue lashings. I just said ok and hung up this time. If I have to go up to this clinic next week and go behind the counter and snatch Diane up, there will be an opening available for anyone who works in or is looking to work in the medical field. Oh yeah, take a wild guess which lady is Diane... 

One of my coworkers feels the need to keep inviting me to her church. I keep telling her that I have my own church and I'm fine. She's asked me 2 or 3 times. Yesterday was the most recent attempt. I said I have my own church and asked why. She said she knows but she just wants me to come with her. If you know me, you know that I haven't been to MY church in a while. I definitely don't want to go to hers. If it's some place that they're going to be shouting, jumping, hollering, or touching me, we will have a problem and she wouldn't invite me back again. Especially, if someone touches me... I'm trying to find a tactful, yet more forceful way to decline her invitations. Please help me out if you have any suggestions. I don't want to call her a stupid bitch, but if I don't have a better solution by the next invite, that will be my response. 

Motherfocker!

So things have been ok with Future Chris. We've spent a lot of time talking/texting and hanging. Not sure how far things will go, although I'm hoping for more than just friends. For some reason I can't get in touch with New Chris. I have some mail for him. I may just take it to his apartment. There really isn't much else going on with me besides my usual neurosis and insomnia. I got my w2... Is that newsworthy? I'm doubting it. Oh................I went to The Happy Mexican and the movies with my coworkers last night. I was so fucked up! I know I fell asleep at some point during Little Fockers. It was good... I was just sloshed like a motherfocker. Yes I spelled it that way purposely. Was supposed to go to this http://www.tsunamimemphis.com/ tonight but I didn't see anything that I'd ever eat on this menu and it's a little bit pricey for me. Maybe we'll pick something else. Well that particular friend just informed me that she can't go out tonight so idk. May have an outing with a different friend(s) tonight. Everything's up in the air at this point. I finished the Charmed DVDs so I guess I'll go back to Avatar. I was thinking about TrueBlood but not in the mood right now and The Boondocks episodes are hit and miss. Avatar will make me laugh and that's what I need. A good laugh and cuddling would be nice. But maybe I'm being greedy. I've been holding that boy hostage 3 weekends in a row. Don't hate me because I like to indulge in decadence. I'm a Taurus. It's my nature. Oh and even after that whole new Zodiac sign and shit I'm STILL a Taurus. I see why y'all mad and gone stay mad. LOL.

Small update

Been a while since I've done this and I apologize. I need to just make time to do it possibly on a weekly basis even if I've had an uneventful week just so that I stay in the habit of blogging. It's been a rough year and the first month isn't even over yet LOL. Work has been super stressful and I just had a fucking root canal today. I thank God for the lortab because it's numbing my body and my mind. I need that because of physical pain and the shock of the bill. I've been trying to eat so that I can take my antibiotics but it's a real struggle. I'd rather be drunk. I'm so over this!

On to some good stuff... I've kinda been trying my hand at this whole dating thing over the past few months. I haven't really been too successful at it either FYI. I've met some great guys but they just haven't been the right guys. I'm no longer seeing the psychologist because of a few reasons. I think my biggest issue with him is that he's a minister and I try to stay away from the clergy or anyone who's deeply entangled in the church. Since him I've met a few guys, 2 of which live very near me in my apartment complex. That freaks me out a little bit. One of them has a "roommate" and their relationship worries me a bit. Supposedly they were going to try a romantic relationship but changed their minds about it. I should take a picture of my face right now and post it, but I won't. Those who know me can imagine it.

Currently, I have an interest in yet another guy named Chris. There are actually 4 guys named Chris that have significance in my life. I've been calling this one "Future Chris," partially because I'm hoping that we have a future together and I've been watching my Charmed DVD sets. I happened to meet him around the same time that Chris came from the future in case any of you are fans of the show. If not, eat a dick. Just kidding. But errumm...yeah I'm really into Future Chris, but he's a bit standoffish at the moment. I think his last relationship did a number on him, which I can totally relate to. We've had about 3 dates and I really like him a lot. We spent the whole weekend together last week. I'm going to try to be patient with him, but in the mean time I gotta keep my mind occupied. Shawn has been encouraging me to see other people, which is difficult for me to do when I have such a strong interest in one. I'm going to make an effort but I can't make any guarantees. Lortab is kicking in now and I'll probably be in and out of sleep.